What do we want from relationships?
We all want to connect with others at a deep level. We yearn for relationships that go beyond superficiality. We want someone to accept us and even appreciate for who we are, all our strengths and weaknesses. Authentic relationships, fueled by genuine connections, have the power to transform our personal and professional lives in profound ways.
In our modern, speedy world with instant communication, you might expect us to form many profound connections. But how many of these relationships can we truly say that they nourish our need for deeper connections? Do they provide the support, understanding, and growth that we might crave?
What relationships give us
Authentic relationships, help us cut through the B.S. of superficiality. We are seen for who we are, or at least who we reveal ourselves to be. These relationships are built on trust and paradoxically, vulnerability. We willingly put the most vulnerable parts of ourselves before these deeper relationships and are rewarded by mutual understanding. These relationships let us to be our true selves. We can express ourselves in a more unfiltered way. In turn, we get opportunities for personal growth, self-acceptance and a sense of belonging.
The forced relationship that changed my life
When I started university in California, we had a one week orientation. We were put into a group, both newbie students, along with second and third year students. As an important side-note, I was the first person in my family to go to college. I had absolutely no clue what university life would be like. This was a week of socializing and getting to know new students. I was able to get my bearings in this new and exciting environment.
But, after the week was over, the orientation was over, and everybody went to their normal lives. I made some friends, but in truth, my social network was still superficial. I was basically alone, in a new place, doing something that really seemed impossible. I had a withdrawal of sorts, and it took me years to learn how to truly form deep relationships.
- It took me years to figure this out. I also had to travel halfway across the world, and live in three different countries. Only then, did I basically “get a clue” about people and their importance in my life.
- Looking back, there was one and only first step:
Acknowledging that I needed these relationships.
